I Waited, I Saw...

I waited...and I saw what I needed to see

How does wisdom dictate?  It allows you to see through patience, experience...and time.

Epiphany...

I saw her sitting at the bottom of a well.  Cold, hungry and unkempt.  I looked everywhere for a rope and when I failed to find one strong enough to lift her, I borrowed money from unseemly types.  I bought the strongest rope you could imagine and dropped it down into the well.  From the top, I yelled at her to set her torso into the noose I had fashioned...no response.

I decided to climb down to see if maybe she needed help getting in the noose only to have her push away the rope at every turn.  For days I tried to reason with her to no avail.  Then, just as I was set to give up, the unseemly types I had borrowed money from pulled up the rope...leaving me in the well to suffer her same fate...  

I took on her odor.  I felt the same hunger pains and lack of rest.  Despair almost overtook my soul in the darkness of that place but I fought it at every turn.  I soon came to find that she had accepted her fate.  She had accepted the idea that the only thing she could do was sail through the winds of a fate she still had the power and strength to change.  Not me...I, through seething anger and hurt, found my way out of the well, saddened the whole time because I knew I was leaving her behind.  You see, after some time, wisdom spoke a thing to me.  I knew that if there was ever a chance to help her again; one, she would have to want my help and two, I would need to be strong enough to pull her up when that time came.  That would mean I would have to walk away.  I would have to bury all care for her under lock and key.  Not do away with it, but keep it in a place in my heart where it would not have any effect on my progress.  I would have to disconnect...

In time, I became strong again and after paying back the unseemly types...I bought my own rope.  Every once and a while I drop the rope down into the well.  I wait like a fisherman waits for a bite.  I watch her from atop and throw down food whenever I can but I will never again make the same mistake I did before.  I will not go down into that well unless I know for certain that she is willing to break her fingers to get out.  Why?  Because then I will be certain she will never want to go back into that well ever again and all my efforts would not have been in vain...

To all the wise.  We know what we know and it is not for the sake of pride I mention this.  Knowing what needs doing obligates us to do what we know to do and that can really hurt sometimes.  It will cause you to deny yourself selfish things more times than not and give you a bad taste for vain endeavors...what most people call "fun".  Leaving you with a handful of friends.  In my humble opinion...that's a small price to pay for all you get in return but it still remains a heavy price nonetheless.  You may have someone that is addicted to a subtle vice that is difficult to peg as evil but you have seen this vice destroy them and yourself.  You cried with them and fought with them for more only to come to the sad conclusion that you care about them more then they do for themselves.  Sorry but sometimes, all you can do is walk away, watch and wait to determine your next move.  Don't get dirty with them unless unless you are certain they are willing to get clean.  This is true in many circumstances and carries with it the heavy heart of eventuality.  You hope against hope that it never has to come to that but all you see has you convinced...it will.   

I waited...and I saw all I needed to see.  I know what comes next...for me...

~Apollo