BABY...IT'S A FIRE SALE...

"...so-er, are you experienced?

ah! have you ever been experienced?

well...I have

ah, let me prove it to you..."

EVERYTHING

MUST

GO

~moses apollo apolinaris

The Carriage And The Bridge...

"I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you

Yes, there's a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you

I've seen the waters that make your eyes shine, now I'm shining too

Because, oh because I've fallen quite hard over you..."

Note: A friend of mine gave me permission to speak on his experience so I could readily share my own with you all on this topic. I share this without mentioning names but do so only with the upmost respect and love.

OK so a friend of mine came across an online "crush" that turned into an online "infatuation". An online infatuation that lead into an online "like" whose curiosity and upkeep flowed into a real love that settled them into an exclusive long distance "dating" situation. Two people fell in love without ever having physically met. Rare but when honest...it can definitively happen. The funny part? After about 5 months, he says they finally met and claims that it was the most awkward situation he's ever been in. He didn't know if he should kiss her or even hold her hand. It was like they were strangers feeling out each others boundaries through awkward vibes. His confusion was an angry one. Why? Well here you have two people that told each other what would happen when they met. How they would kiss, how they would make love to each other etc and when the time came...zilch, nada...nothing.

Why is that funny? Well...I've already been there myself. Folks, if humans can build up an unwitnessed event around a simple photo in their minds, how much more can they build a whole life around conversations had in the quiet of what was inspired by real inner contact. Anything and everything can be shared unseen. Why? Because in such conditions we are no longer privy to what can drive or stifle conversation...facial expression and body language. So the very thing that we are initially instinctively conditioned to watch for comes so late to the party, that it appears as a third wheel tryin to play catch up at these brand new meet-ups. It's the funniest thing to watch her make a face when she thinks you're not looking after a joke is told you thought would make her laugh based on your online conversations. So was it all fully genuine? Was there some "yeah, me too!!" bullsh*t goin on? Of course!! As there is in any courtship except in these cases...we don't catch them as they remain unseen.

Given this, my friend had asked me if I thought they had made a mistake. If there was a chance they made up their feelings for each other as some online ego driven venture. Knowing what I know of their honest natures, I said "absolutely not". That all that was left was to get past the conundrum of leading with "bedroom talk" as opposed to the mundane and finding a way to reconcile the two. Folks, in a normal real life (as opposed to online) situation, the things shared in intimate online conversation were usually shared over time...and sometimes with the lights off in bed (lol) "Pillow talk" was the kind of talk that drew two people that dug each other even closer. You already knew what kind of food they liked, where they lived and if they had any pets. Pillow talk brought you into their childhood, examples of what exes did that drove them crazy, their favorite sexual position etc Online? We lead with this instead...and meet-ups are now a way to find out the rest. THIS is what makes it all so damn uncomfortable. You know just about everything EXCEPT what it feels like to actually be around them. So when the time comes, will you like the physical incarnation of the avatar you fell in love with online? That my beautiful people can take one meeting...or many. What determines that? The nature of the two meeting. Some folks think they can size someone up right away and seven times out of ten, they can...but only if the mark is simple. The complex take more time to understand so it will take more meet-ups to be sure and depending on the situation...that ain't always easy. Life happens and yes, that can and does at times get in the way. As such, some are happy to maintain the online "love" because that don't come with the mundane "hang-ups" but such a thing is so-incomplete it becomes a fantasy. Un-tested in every way. I can touch you internally from wherever I am...a beautiful gift. Yet in all it's beauty, it is incomplete without the puzzle piece it's meant to inspire. Like a man or a woman that can stand on their own. Strong and sure yes? Grant these two compatibles a task...and watch what happens. The internal energy co-mingling with external points that encircle each other creating a beautiful piece of symphonic magic is something only God could articulate. THIS...is what I seek...divinity fully expressed in brutal truth... 

In my "adventures" I've come across all types. The aggressive, the meek and the in between. The ones that wanted to find out who I actually was and the ones that feigned this curiosity to get me into bed. Some have so built up in their minds this fictitious "sexual god" (poetry, pics etc will do that...just ONE part of me) they were afraid to disappoint so they only went so far while others went for the damn gusto like I was some damn gigolo always at the ready to ride. Didn't mind either so long as they came to regulate their heart and mind into a truth; that I was a human being that was everything I said I was. Thankfully, so far that's always been the case. So what did I tell my friend?

I let him know that there's a bridge out there they both need to cross if they want this to work the way think it should because so far...they gone riding horses alone. Sending messages to each other from each end of the bridge. You see at the center of that bridge is their carriage. The one distinctively created by countless messages of love and hope. A carriage where they can sit and talk about bullsh*t. A carriage where they were meant to hitch both their horses to so it can carry them a bit here and there and maybe (if the stars continue to align), through a life they've chosen to now navigate together. On it, they can talk about how their day went, what their friend told them they couldn't believe, how their kids football game went etc  All without the expectations framed by their own imaginations. Yet always at the ready...to fulfill one or two ;-) I'm out my loves...

~moses 

Evo-revolution...Continues...

a life of constant flux...expected

unexpected...what new lenses are showin me

i've watched enough...i now know enough

some good, some bad...some beautiful, some ugly

all in all: growth brings us here every so often...nothing new to me

adapting to new weight requires one be more judicious with what they decide to carry

some of what will remain will be seen through a different prism

some will wane...others intensify. no longer my concern...i will remain who and what i am

i've watched enough...i now know enough

trials come like torrential rain...they can drown you or water you into new growth

that part is always up to you

~moses apollo