1 Corinthians 13:11
"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."
Wow, what a day. My son turned 16 today and my youngest is headed to high school in a few short months. We had a good time today but it hit me hard...they are becoming men. Men, that like their father, are like mules...stubborn as sh*t. The hearts they carry are soft enough to make women swoon and strong enough to make men take notice. They are Alphas and whats worse is that they wear it on their sleeves...also...like their father. To raise such takes a heavy combination of compassion, understanding, street smarts and love. I pray God give me all that in abundance. My pride as a father has no ceiling when it comes to them. They have shown me that even in error, they are still men of conscience and character...something I have focused my energy to instill. Something that has been my desire in prayers for many years. Now they take new steps on new levels. Levels that will require more of their manhood. Levels that will challenge them and help them configure these new levels of maturity...in every aspect.
Now, onto the topic at hand...
Paul spoke these words in the context of love. Yet they reverberate in every context. He described love as nothing short of surrender. Where for the sake of love, all is forgiven, all is tolerated...all is OK. That if one could reach that level of love, he or she would be able to match the love Christ displayed on the cross; to sacrifice oneself for the sake of loving another...even when they completely reject you. I know this love...at least I can say with the purest sincerity...that I understand it. I have loved this way only to find heartache and exhaustion in the end. Sometimes worth it but sometimes...not. This is why to "love" for me is more than mere butterflies and poetry...there must be maturity and an associated value for it to flourish. The Don Juan's of this world throw that word around as much as the word "and" but I have learned that one must be careful if it's real. Even more so to take even greater care that it's not given away cheap. As a child I fell in love with every girl I went out with. As a man, I found that there are in fact different reasons why attraction would set in and that not every goose bump means anything losing sleep over. The emotionally immature individual is one that is easily blown away into thinking they are in love or "connected". When it comes to gamers, these are the easiest marks. They think that every "feeling" of attraction is one worthy of exploration...even if they already have someone they are committed to. The emotionally mature individual understands that emotions can easily be influenced by environment and circumstance. They examine what they are feeling and if truly committed, their "struggle" ends quickly. They can be in a room with someone of the opposite sex they are really "feeling" and still keep all the doors shut.
When I was married, I ran into many attractive women that saw my marriage as a minor inconvenience that the "heat of the moment" could overcome. Problem was, I was what my sister once described as "REALLY married". I found them attractive and had chemistry with a few...but that was as far as it went. I knew the places, phrases and topics to avoid and I did my best not play with my marriage or ever put it at risk. It had great value to me and I handled it with the care of an adult. Why? because it takes the responsibility of an adult to truly love someone. To truly love someone and claim exclusivity means that they are it...you look no further nor are pursuits welcomed. You are now responsible for making sure that your emotional investment is handled correctly. Training yourself to know and understand that because of that love and stated commitment, everything else that presents itself as an "option" is a mirage that stems from your human need of "self". A child wants whatever he or she wants without thought of what it would mean to possess what they desire. To possess another under the banner of love means that you are now responsible for the very heart given you and that is not something anyone should take lightly. No matter how appealing the "option", if the love is real...the appeal should not be an issue for anymore than a day. The emotionally mature understand that it only looks like an oasis because of their vantage point. Move from that spot and tell me if you still see the same thing...chances are you wont. To risk what you have declared to be love for something that feels good in the moment is one of the most childish things anyone can do. Problem is you only find out when it's too late...after the damage has been done.
So please don't throw these three little words around unless they are meant in earnest. When I love, I love as a man...with sincere passion. You will hear it my speech, you will feel it in my touch and you will see it by my deeds. Expecting the same in return and not getting it is one of the most frustrating experiences one could have...believe me I know. So take great care in where and in whom you invest...make sure they are worth it before uttering those words. Be mature...be the adult you claim to be. Love, but love wisely...only investing your love into a heart that will count that precious gift as something worth taking responsibility for. Believe me when I tell you...real love is not something readily available today. When you find it, it's worth fighting for...I'm out...
"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."
Wow, what a day. My son turned 16 today and my youngest is headed to high school in a few short months. We had a good time today but it hit me hard...they are becoming men. Men, that like their father, are like mules...stubborn as sh*t. The hearts they carry are soft enough to make women swoon and strong enough to make men take notice. They are Alphas and whats worse is that they wear it on their sleeves...also...like their father. To raise such takes a heavy combination of compassion, understanding, street smarts and love. I pray God give me all that in abundance. My pride as a father has no ceiling when it comes to them. They have shown me that even in error, they are still men of conscience and character...something I have focused my energy to instill. Something that has been my desire in prayers for many years. Now they take new steps on new levels. Levels that will require more of their manhood. Levels that will challenge them and help them configure these new levels of maturity...in every aspect.
Now, onto the topic at hand...
Paul spoke these words in the context of love. Yet they reverberate in every context. He described love as nothing short of surrender. Where for the sake of love, all is forgiven, all is tolerated...all is OK. That if one could reach that level of love, he or she would be able to match the love Christ displayed on the cross; to sacrifice oneself for the sake of loving another...even when they completely reject you. I know this love...at least I can say with the purest sincerity...that I understand it. I have loved this way only to find heartache and exhaustion in the end. Sometimes worth it but sometimes...not. This is why to "love" for me is more than mere butterflies and poetry...there must be maturity and an associated value for it to flourish. The Don Juan's of this world throw that word around as much as the word "and" but I have learned that one must be careful if it's real. Even more so to take even greater care that it's not given away cheap. As a child I fell in love with every girl I went out with. As a man, I found that there are in fact different reasons why attraction would set in and that not every goose bump means anything losing sleep over. The emotionally immature individual is one that is easily blown away into thinking they are in love or "connected". When it comes to gamers, these are the easiest marks. They think that every "feeling" of attraction is one worthy of exploration...even if they already have someone they are committed to. The emotionally mature individual understands that emotions can easily be influenced by environment and circumstance. They examine what they are feeling and if truly committed, their "struggle" ends quickly. They can be in a room with someone of the opposite sex they are really "feeling" and still keep all the doors shut.
When I was married, I ran into many attractive women that saw my marriage as a minor inconvenience that the "heat of the moment" could overcome. Problem was, I was what my sister once described as "REALLY married". I found them attractive and had chemistry with a few...but that was as far as it went. I knew the places, phrases and topics to avoid and I did my best not play with my marriage or ever put it at risk. It had great value to me and I handled it with the care of an adult. Why? because it takes the responsibility of an adult to truly love someone. To truly love someone and claim exclusivity means that they are it...you look no further nor are pursuits welcomed. You are now responsible for making sure that your emotional investment is handled correctly. Training yourself to know and understand that because of that love and stated commitment, everything else that presents itself as an "option" is a mirage that stems from your human need of "self". A child wants whatever he or she wants without thought of what it would mean to possess what they desire. To possess another under the banner of love means that you are now responsible for the very heart given you and that is not something anyone should take lightly. No matter how appealing the "option", if the love is real...the appeal should not be an issue for anymore than a day. The emotionally mature understand that it only looks like an oasis because of their vantage point. Move from that spot and tell me if you still see the same thing...chances are you wont. To risk what you have declared to be love for something that feels good in the moment is one of the most childish things anyone can do. Problem is you only find out when it's too late...after the damage has been done.
So please don't throw these three little words around unless they are meant in earnest. When I love, I love as a man...with sincere passion. You will hear it my speech, you will feel it in my touch and you will see it by my deeds. Expecting the same in return and not getting it is one of the most frustrating experiences one could have...believe me I know. So take great care in where and in whom you invest...make sure they are worth it before uttering those words. Be mature...be the adult you claim to be. Love, but love wisely...only investing your love into a heart that will count that precious gift as something worth taking responsibility for. Believe me when I tell you...real love is not something readily available today. When you find it, it's worth fighting for...I'm out...
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