Huey...

"...my spiritual brother would walk the halls saying..."Y entonces?"..."

Most of our cities are built by people.  The Empire State building, "Times Square" and all that surrounds it.  Just like the cities we live in, our internal cities, are built by God and people He decides to bring our way.  My city?  My city had a worker bee named Huey.  A janitor at the "Atrium Palace".  A beautiful high rise out of Ft. Lee, New Jersey where I worked as a Doorman/Concierge.  Fresh in a marriage and so very young, someone landed me a job there.  I felt like a fish out of water but shit I was good.  I got along with everybody but would soon find out that my hiring had a personal motive behind it.  You see it turns out the boss needed a replacement for the guy before me...he was fucking the shit out of her.  I guess she thought I could fit the bill.  I saw the advances and paid no mind.  Soon, my spiritual leanings became clear but by then, God had given me grace with the tenants in the building, so firing me was out of the question lol  It was a crazy ride but nothing I couldn't handle...even then.

Huey...my brother.  What can I say about Huey?  He and his brother were Trinidadian.  They both had been there awhile.  Huey as a janitor and his brother as night security.  Huey was as spiritually inclined as I was while his brother was the polar opposite.  Thankfully, I got along very well with them both.  They became brothers to me.  Huey would at times roam the halls saying "Y entonces?" and other times, he would be praying in tongues out loud.  You all with "ears to hear" understand what that means.  His brother would share life experiences with me the times I worked nights and it was the first time I would learn what it was to actually be "all things to all men".  As for the building itself?  I won't say who lived there but you would know them if I did.  It was that kind of building.  CEO's of companies we all know and love.  Shit, even some celebs left there footprints there from time to time.  It was an easy ride for me to say the least...except for one thing...

This was the first place I had been challenged to cheat on my wife.  The first place where all I had to do was reach out and say "thank you".  The very first place where I was challenged with the the proposition of "no one will ever know, I just want you for a night".  This is where I learned that commitment meant something.  Where I would be faced with an internal challenge.  Where the foundations to my internal buildings would begin.  

I was challenged on a weekly basis.  Rich women and their daughters, sought openings with me.  I think it had more to do with the fact that the guy before me had made it commonplace than the idea I was this "stud".  It became a fiasco my co-workers laughed about while I "bobbed and weaved" finding ways to hold my ground as a married man without jeopardizing my job.  You see I believed in the oath I took on my wedding day and I knew I could not violate it.  That crazy idea coupled with the love I had for my wife was enough to keep me standing.  It was tough but thanks to God's strength...I made it through with a new-found understanding.  The understanding of speaking a thing...and sticking to it.

Why do I mention Huey?  Because an off the cuff statement he made crystallized my purpose for being there.  One day he witnessed just a taste of what I was enduring and said to me..."Now I know why the Lord had you marry so young...".  So many things rushed through my soul after that statement and today, I understand them all.  I value the institution of marriage.  I divorced because in truth, I never wanted to violate that institution the way every other male in my family had done...among other factors of course.  They have ALL failed.  They have all cheated and I knew I had that in me.  It would have been all too easy for me to do and seeing what all the females in family went through...I knew Millie never deserved to experience that kind of pain.

Now we come to today...I said it already.  "What if" is for children.  Looking back at my life, I know I would have been a false minister.  A man without a compass.  I would have been preaching the Gospel by day and fucking parishioners by night.  I would have made a serious mess of things and ruined many lives.  Being the man I am, I know this to be true.  I accept now that God knew what he was doing.  My marriage gave me that compass and taught me self-control by way of honor.  Every job I had tested me since and thankfully, I passed even the most difficult.  Even the ones where God knew to intervene.  

These experiences taught me the value of a "word".  The value of what is spoken.  I do not subscribe to the idea that a man's job is to dip his dick wherever he can.  I do subscribe to the idea that a vow is a vow.  I, by the grace of God, upheld my end.  My vow remains sacred.  Nothing can ever change that.  As for my job, after nine months, I would be fired.  My boss sought a reason and I willingly gave it to her...I was almost always late lol  Oh well...

Folks, God created you, myself and this universe by His Word.  If you believe this then you must understand the power behind all you say.  Never say I love you unless you mean it and if you are married...stick to the vow you have made on your wedding day.  Be a man and woman of honor...

My city has a damn good foundation and this is why I choose to rebuild upon it.  My buildings may need repair but my foundation remains solid...

Oh yeah, just one more thing.  Huey's phrase..."Y entonces?" in English is loosely translated..."what's next?".  Think about that question the next time you decide to do anything foolish...

"Y entonces?..."

~Apollo